This song is good, the guy who wrote it had frontotemporal dementia. Press play.
by Tajo McBurnie
I used to know this cat. The name that he called himself was Daveford Bramson, he called himself Cat Daddy. We would go all kindsa places together. He, Cat Daddy, had this cousin, big guy, he lived in this town called Constitution Constitution, New Hampshire was where it was. He lifted all kindsa weights in front of his house and he would go on in and eat sandwiches, big sandwitches. His dad would eat them too and he would drink hot hot coffee. Anyways Cat Daddy, whenever he would see people crossing the street he would yell “Stop”, he would yell “Stop”. They wouldn’t stop see cause we all knew cross walk Cat Daddy and they would cross the street right in front of him and he wouldn’t say anything about it.
One time ol’ pal Cat Daddy, my friend Daveford Bramson showed me this place under a bridge. He and his friends would go down there at night time, sometimes the people who crossed the street would be there. It was pretty dark under the bridge most of the time. There was this guy down there who sold packs of bubblegum with baseball cards, but he wouldn’t sell any, not to Cat Daddy. Sometimes down there’d be a whole big group of people down there, they’d wear costumes and buy gum and baseball cards.
One time my mom used to come home pretty late, she’d make me a big dinner and macaroni and she’d even boil water and forget about it and all the water would evaporate. Sometimes she’d go right to sleep and guys would come in and sometimes they would bring their dogs, one time a guy brought a white ferret and he even let me touch it. I would go through her purse and sometimes the guys would too, Cat Daddy was there sometimes too. She would even have a few gum wrappers in there but I wasn’t scared of them.
I had this neighbor who told me he had a big collection of stuff like rat’s scabs because he had all these snakes that would get too scared to eat the means rats so he would have to kill em by himself so his snakes had something to eat, but I didn’t really believe him. Cat Daddy and I tried to sneak into his house one time, he had his own behind where his dad lived that was really small and had tiny little windows on each side. He made a little fence outta rat bones, which were mostly ribs and we thought it might be bad luck to cross so we didn’t.
We were pretty good at fighting too, we fought this kid, his name was Lenny, his mom was a crossing guard, he tried to slice me up one time with this stick he sharpened so me and Cat Daddy took him down kinda near that bridge and we almost drowned him but we didn’t. We took his stick too. We even fought this guy one time who was a grown man. He kept following us around and he said that he was the Cat Daddy and we were only his Cat Babies. We got Lenny and my neighbor to all hold him down and we spat right in his face, then we robbed him, even his shirt. It had three B’s on it in a triangle shape. We made it our flag and put it on Cat Daddy’s bike.